Mother's Day can be an incredibly tough day for children and teenagers who have lost their mum. This special day for so many can bring up a lot of emotions for grieving kids. It can make them feel isolated and can be hard for them to navigate without feeling overwhelmed. Grieving kids are not alone. Sadly, many children experience the loss of a parent before they turn 18. Children can take comfort knowing that they can keep their mum’s memory alive and celebrate her love and legacy in their own way, which can provide comfort and meaning during challenging times.
Each child experiences grief differently. It’s important to remember that they might not have the emotional tools or words to express their feelings which is why finding special ways to remember mum on Mother’s Day can be helpful.
In the lead up to Mother’s Day, the shops and Mother’s Day stalls at schools may be overwhelming for children bereaved by the death of their mum. Even if your mum has passed away, you still have a mum. Buying a card allows you to think about your mother and connect with her. Writing a message to her, whatever you want to say, is a beautiful way of expressing your love for your mum. You could write an update about your life, or share a special memory you have together, or simply talk about how you’re feeling. This process might make the shops and Mother’s Day stalls at school a little easier. Children and teens might also want to celebrate other important women in their life on Mother’s Day, such as an aunty, grandmother or caregiver.
Here are a few suggestions to help children and teenagers to honour and remember their mums on Mother’s Day, with helpful strategies to navigate the day:
Doing things that remind you of your mum on Mother’s Day can help you feel closer to your mum. Buying some of your mums favourite flowers, cooking your mum’s favourite dinner, listening to her favourite music, or doing an activity that she enjoyed or you used to do together, are different ways of remembering your mum on Mother’s Day and maintaining your connection with her.
Mother’s Day can be a good opportunity to talk about your mum to family, friends, or people who knew her. Talking about your own memories with your mum or hearing about other people’s memories is a beautiful way to remember her on Mother’s Day. You might learn things you didn’t know before, such as what she was like as a child.
For adolescents in particular, it may feel like they are bombarded with social media posts of friends and their mums. If you think that seeing other people’s Mother’s Day posts might cause you distress, try to limit your use of social media on Mother’s Day.
Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for kids who have lost their mum. Although their physical presence may be missing, their mum’s love and presence can stay with them in their hearts. Remembering the happy times spent together and the love mum gave can bring a sense of comfort and healing.
Sending love and strength,
Nicque & Lillian